In my mind, those of you who are scared of changing the food on your plate are not sacred of changing the food on your plate. The real issue is changing your focus. Letting the light in. Half empty is comforting. It ensures that since you won’t be reaching you won’t be falling. There will be no scrapes that need tending and stingy alcohol. They call it “cruise control” for a reason. But I ask you this, is it breezy and warm inside your own personal city limits or deep down does it feel like prison?” Kris Carr
“Whenever you are sincerely pleased you are nourished” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
We must have said it a dozen times over the weekend. The word ‘nourished’ tripped off of our tongues accompanied by gratitude and love. It amazes me how little we focus on nourishing ourselves – on checking in, creating meals with love, buying the best ingredients we can afford, sitting down together with thanks and awareness for our blessings – and either ignore our needs, or focus on the needs of others.
I came from a family that used to say Grace before dinner. In today’s increasingly secular western world it is a rare thing to still find someone saying a prayer over their meal. As I was sitting at our table on Saturday I felt the urge to say a word of thanks. I was overwhelmed by the effort that had gone into the meal. I wanted to say thank you to Leonie for cooking it, to the farmers for growing it, to the spirit of the plants and the animals that gave their life for it and for my friends who were sharing it with me. When you stop to think about how food gets to you, it is really quite incredible. We are so blessed.
I made a decision that day to try and remember to experience food in a more sacred way and to begin to be more consciously grateful for it. It’s quite hard at times. My piece of toast in the morning doesn’t get the same attention as a plate full of food, but it all takes practice. I firmly believe that gratitude is never wasted. I might not say a traditional prayer over my dinner, but if I can keep conscious as I eat it, I hope I can experience grace.
“If anything at all were possible, how would you live your life?” – Christiane Northrup
I remember going to visit one of my Uncles when I was about 12. He had the most amazing music collection. To me all of those albums felt like magic. I can trace the growth of my CD/ download collection back to the moment I stood in his living room and realized that I wanted a cool music collection too. Can jealousy help us become who we are?
I started working at a summer camp when I was 16. One of the older counsellors was so cool. She wore converse shoes with huge socks (hey, it was the early 90s!) and the coolest clothing I had ever seen. I bought converse shoes on my first break, and wore them with huge socks. A year later I arrived at camp with a wardrobe and good friends of my own and watched as the younger staff copied the fashion of the older generation. Was it really about shoes?
In January 2006 I saw the adventure that some of my favorite bloggers had when they met in person. A week after they met, Swirly wrote a post that galvanized me to start my own blog. In the years since, I have made some incredible friends – and yes – I have even met some in person! It was jealousy that cracked me open enough to be brave.
The thing I am learning on my journey to create my wings is that every emotion is actually a message. Jealousy is nothing more than realizing that there is something that you want for yourself. I know it wasn’t about music or shoes or being friends with those specific women. Jealousy was me wanting to be more than I was. I wanted to be cool, to be accepted, to have my own tribe of women to meet. By listening to jealousy’s whispers, I have made decisions and choices that have made me who I am.
Now I think it is exciting when I get jealous! Jealousy does not take away from how happy I am for other people when they do well – I think it actually makes me a better friend – I can be thrilled for them knowing that there is enough for me too!
Doing some blog surfing today I felt awe and jealousy when I saw Jaime’s photographs, Jenn’s book deal, Kelly Rae’s success, and Danielle’s general blazing-ness. I want to celebrate their achievements and share the inspiration. Separately from that, I know that I want some of that beauty, honesty, and success for myself. Luckily I also know that there is plenty of that to go around if I work hard enough.
Roar.
What is jealousy telling you today?
