who I am

I remember now.

June 18, 2012

“Creativity, and the meaning we bring to the celebration of life, is the way in which women naturally walk in radiance.” – Pixie Campbell

meg italy web

I have lost count of the number of times I have sat down to write a blog post. There are a dozen posts sitting in limbo – some half finished, some finished – waiting for me to have the heart to hit publish.

Nothing has felt right.

I have felt lost and uninspired; bored of myself and my declarations.

I’ve been to London with my tribe to see the sparkling Martha Beck. I’ve been to Italy and filled up my beauty bank. I’ve been to London to visit the Queen. I have a lot to tell you.

But it wasn’t enough to kick my butt back here – until today.

This morning I read these words of Pixie’s and they found the dark, hiding part of me that needed to hear them:

“Creativity, and the meaning we bring to the celebration of life, is the way in which women naturally walk in radiance.”- Pixie Campbell*

In my rush and my work and my stress and my anxiety and my need to write things that please you and my grown-up-stuckness, I have let slide the two things that are the most essential to who-I-am: creativity and celebration. All this time I was looking for a way to shine a light, but first I had to remember where mine truly was.

I am a writer. I am a seeker. I can find magic anywhere. I want to tell you stories and tell your stories. I love to celebrate everything in every way. I can see to the heart and the possibilities in anything. I am still afraid of my own bigness. I want to consciously decide how to live each day. I have a profound belief in the sacredness of all things. I want to shine a light.

That’s who I am and what my blog is going to be about.

I remember now.

*This quote is used by permission and is from the Solstice Soulodge. Summer session starts on July 2nd!

emerge, Musings, Sacred Feminine, Stillness

Where Do I Fit?

October 5, 2011

“All mystics speak the same language for they come from the same country.” – Saint-Martin

Where do you go when you don’t fit anywhere?

This question has been haunting me for a very long time. I – like many others – never quite felt that I fit. I didn’t ever really have a dream or a heroine that I could point to and emphatically say: “that is what I want to be when I grow up.” I thought I wanted to teach, I thought I wanted to write, I thought I wanted to run an outdoor education centre, I thought I wanted to get married and have two point two kids, but I never knew.

This past summer I spent some time in a place that is holy for me. From the time that I was small, Algonquin Park in Ontario has soothed my soul. Walking one of the trails, I realized that despite the steep climb, for the first time in a long time, I was feeling peace. It wasn’t because I had found any answers to my perpetual questions, it was because I was letting the park – one of my oldest friends – guide me.

I’ve been trying to distill the lesson I got into something coherent, but it is elusive. It’s not a sentence or a phrase, it is a feeling. To find where you fit, you need to find what feels sacred to you and do that or be there as much as you can. If go go there with an open heart and a willing soul, you will see glimpses of the peace that has been eluding you.

You will find that your fit isn’t so hard to find after all.

bbc, emerge, emotions, fear, Sacred Feminine, writing

Where Your Heart Is

June 26, 2011

“Where your heart is, there is your power. Without this energy nothing in your life can manifest or flourish, from your romantic relationships to your artistic creativity.” – Caroline Myss (from Sacred Contracts)

She said to me: “I love your shoes. Very Sacred Feminine.” When I had caught my breath she had already moved on to another conversation. Sometimes moments like that really throw me. I spend a lot of my time going through the world knowing that people have no idea who I am. To be seen like that is a gift I do not take lightly.

I stopped blogging because I was scared of where I was going. I was scared of the path through the trees and the images that were coming to me. I was scared that you wouldn’t like it if I went on and on about stories and archetypes and metaphors. I was scared that I would come across as a new-age nut and no-one would read a word I wrote ever again. I had been joined by the old pain-in-the-ass: “Who Do You Think You Are?”

What I discovered, however, is that once you crack open the door to your heart, there is no closing it again. I’ve been bombarded with signs and dreams and connections and messages and messengers and love. In the face of all of that, who am I not to listen? So I’m back and I am listening and I am writing and I know that this kind of writing is where my heart is.

“Where your heart is, there is your power.” Carolinewriting Myss is a genius.

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I remember now.

“Creativity, and the meaning we bring to the celebration of life, is the way in which women naturally walk in radiance.” – Pixie Campbell

Where Do I Fit?

“All mystics speak the same language for they come from the same country.” – Saint-Martin

Where Your Heart Is

“Where your heart is, there is your power. Without this energy nothing in your life can manifest or flourish, from your romantic relationships to your artistic creativity.” – Caroline Myss (from Sacred Contracts)

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