Letting Go

“Ask yourself which fear is stronger. What are you more afraid of: changing, or staying how you are now?”

Just inside of my book, there is a note from me. It states that when I was writing Unfurl, I had the strangest feeling that I was writing it for someone specific. It didn’t feel like it was mine. It felt like it also belonged to the person I was writing it for. There are even parts of the book that I don’t remember writing.

When I finally let go of chasing the traditional publishing route and decided to self-publish, things began to flow so quickly and easily that I couldn’t believe I had wasted so much time waiting. I started to beat myself up with guilt and shame and then I remembered with a bump that everything happens in its own time.

Maybe I wasn’t ready to hold space for this book. Maybe the person for whom I was writing wasn’t ready to read it. Maybe the world wasn’t ready for it. Maybe, just maybe, it wanted to be born on the day of the Blood Moon (it was – but I didn’t do it on purpose).

So I tried very hard to let go. When I released Unfurl to the world, all I asked was that it go directly from my heart to the heart of anyone who needed to hear what it has to say.  I hoped that it would find its readers, and in doing that would find its Reader. I hoped that in some small way my words would inspire someone else to follow their dreams and for them to bring light into the world.

Big dreams for a small book, I know!

I thought I had let go, but as I hadn’t told my brother about it yet, I wanted to hold on until he’d seen it – and it wasn’t supposed to be available for 5 – 7 days. I tried to control that. Then I put one sneaky shot on Instagram and I lost control – in the best possible way!

And then something even better happened!

Friends, family, friends of friends and family, people I haven’t seen or talked to in YEARS, and women who I have connected deeply with but never actually met in person, bought it. They bought it. They talked about it. With no advertising or launch (mostly because it happened a week earlier than I thought it would) with freebies or hoopla of any kind, it reached the top 5 in ‘Hot New Releases in Metaphysical’ writing category. Now I know Metaphysical writing is a tough category 😉  – but it is amazing because Love put it there. Love and connection and friendship and kinship.

And that is all I ever wanted.

So I am now really letting go; I got the message the second time. Unfurl is free to do what it wants to do. It is free to find the hearts it needs to find. I wish it nothing but love.

And if you bought a copy? Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.