Maybe there’s a way out of the cage where you live/ Maybe one of these days you can let the light in/ Show me how big your brave is – Sara Bareilles
Seven years. That is how long it has been since I finished the first draft of Unfurl. Seven years. Some people would say that my entire skeleton has regenerated in that time.
Why has it taken so long?
Because I listened to what ‘they’ told me about needing an agent and a traditional publisher. Because I lost a little more momentum with every rejection letter I received. Because I spent a month researching what other people felt was the best self-publishing platform. Because because because.
It’s been seven years because I was afraid.
The Who-Do-You-Think-You-Are gremlins set up a tea party in my head and invited their good friends: Not-Good-Enough and Not-Really-A-Writer. There was also a healthy side order of me not wanting to ‘out’ myself as a spiritual writer (Who-Do-You-Think-You-Are’ also hosted this party). This will be hilarious to anyone who has read one word of my blog during this time.
And then one day the fear of never publishing this book was bigger than the fear tea party. So I got brave and just took the leap.
If you could have seen my brave that day, it was the size of an elephant – a big one – and it had a wolf and a dragon and a black jaguar and a red fox and a couple of angels, a tribe, and a few ancestors beside it. I was a whole team of brave.
I still don’t know exactly how it is going to go, but I do know that no matter what else happens, I have published my book. It’s out in the world. That is something I can always be proud of. That, and how brave I was to do it.
So tell me: what is your dream? What has been waiting to come through you?
How big is your brave?
xo
your book is stonkingly good. your spiritual team are having a fucking big party right now and have invited all the gremlins and mean voices so they can see just how much fun it is when brave is in charge. the world needs your brave <3
I’ll never forget the last morning of Redfox ’13 and how possible my life now, suddenly seemed. You could see it and you didn’t have any doubt and somehow that made me brave enough to believe you. And eventually that spilled over and took on a life of its owns and now I can’t remember why I was so scared.
I am so grateful to have The Grandmothers standing beside and behind and ahead of me – I think we all need a tribe to lift us up and help us to see ourselves as they see us.
You are magic xx
I can’t wait for your book to arrive! And the timing of YOUR bravery is fitting as I buckle down to write a story that has been brewing within me for years (lifetimes?) I have no idea what I am doing … just trying to take one step each day, trusting if I do so, the next step on this path will present itself. But so easy to slip back into overwhelm … so I will be propping your book up by my writing space as inspiration! xo
The book looks great, my copy is on it’s way! Heather x
Congratulations on your book, it looks wonderful! I think you were very brave indeed, it is so hard to overcome that old conditioning. But you did it and here your beautiful book is. I’m so glad I found your website, I look forward to reading more. Any place which has “wild soul” as the captcha code for my comment has to be wonderful! 🙂