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food, Plenty

The Missing Ingredient

November 19, 2012

“I just couldn’t get away from the siren call of the kitchen that is an inherent part of me. The kitchen of which I speak is both literal and metaphoric. It’s the sum of what I’ve learnt so far, and am still learning.” – Sophie Dahl, Miss Dahl’s Voluptuous Delights.

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I have a confession to make: I hate cooking. I hate it. It literally makes me itch. Now, like a lot of things in my life, if I was okay with hating cooking, then all would be well, but I don’t want to hate cooking.

The weird thing is that I love the idea of cooking. New cookbooks make me drool. I pre-ordered Sophie Dahl’s new cookbook months ago and lovingly caress the covers of Risotto with Nettles and Plenty every time I am in a bookstore. I open the pages of Heidi’s books and something in my soul feels better – just owning them nourishes me – but I have yet to cook anything from them.

In my dreams I stand rosy cheeked and happy beside a stove while cooking something delectable. Stirring fresh basil into my sauce, I create magic just like Vianne in Chocolat. In reality, my back starts to ache and my teeth grind against one another in barely contained tension. It’s so bad that my husband (who cooks nearly all of our meals) completely avoids the kitchen when I am making dinner.

What is it – the missing ingredient that links desire and reality?

I know that I love beautiful things and that good food can be exquisitely beautiful. I love the whimsy and the theatricality of ingredients and their presentation. I love the alchemy that is involved in something going on its journey from seed to plate. I can be the most rapt and appreciative dinner guest – but it loses all magic when I am the one having to do the work.

So there is the challenge: learn how to find the exquisite in the preparation instead of just the outcome. See the beauty that lies in the work. Delight in the journey.

Or just get someone else to cook for me.

I am completely open to invitations.

xo

food, Uncategorized

Which is Sweeter?

October 31, 2011

Drugs that are abused by only a few (such as heroin) get outlawed, while drugs that are abused by everyone (such as caffeine and sugar) receive legal immunity. It’s mob rule. And the mob is addicted to sugar.” – Mike Adams (NaturalNews.com)

 

ice cream statue bath web

I don’t talk about food on here very much because although it is a real interest of mine, I am not a nutritionist or a chef and there are plenty of those people writing blogs.  But I have been on a food adventure for the past couple of months and I really wanted to share it with you – because it has been life changing. I promise that this has not and will not become a food blog!

Three years ago I was diagnosed with Celiac (Coeliac) Disease, and after both of us eating gluten-free for three weeks and then going to a friend’s for pizza and beer we discovered the hard way that my husband also couldn’t eat gluten.

Cutting something as pervasive as gluten out of your diet requires constant attention. I read every single label and question every single waiter, so I was well prepared for my latest adventure: cutting out sugar for three months.  I decided to try it out because Kris Carr and Dr. Mark Hyman both talked me into it, and the best part about changing your diet is that if it doesn’t work, you can easily change it back.

It’s not easy.  It’s actually easier to cut out gluten than it is to cut out sugar. Gluten-free is gluten-free and that is all there is to it. Sugar-free gives manufacturers license to put in all kinds of other crap.  Yes, I said crap. Sweeteners, while being lovely and sweet, still make me and my body want sugar. So I skipped the question of what is and isn’t a healthy sweetener and I cut out the lot. I mean no maple syrup or honey or aspartame (the devil) or even stevia. I wanted to stop my body from wanting sugar so why would I eat that stuff and give my mouth mixed signals?

Hard? Yes.

Worth it? Absolutely.

Within a month I lost 17lbs without even trying.  Now I am not being smug because I didn’t get all virtuous over night. I did largely replace sugar with salt, but still the weight fell off.

The eczema which has always plagued my hands? Gone in the first three days.

Weirdly, where my eyebrows had been sparse before, they grew in.

But the very best part of all is the way that my mind and body feel.  I feel like I have stepped off of the crazy train.  I feel stronger, clearer, healthier, saner, and more rational.  I can stand back from the dessert menu and know that I will feel sick and fuzzy and tired if I eat anything on it.  I have been so much more productive and steady and focused that I feel like a different person. I feel like I have my power back.

So the question is which is sweeter: a mouthful of something with sugar in it or the feeling of having a clear, powerful head on my shoulders?

Easy.  I choose me.

“…get off the sugar and save your brain.” – Dr. Mark Hyman The Ultramind Solution

food, Musings

What a Difference a Fly Makes

May 15, 2011

“You were created to travel lightly on this planet, with the same sense of joy that little children have.” – Marianne Williamson

 

My first job was working as a costumed historical interpreter. In normal terms, I was a pioneer.  I can’t believe it now, but they hired me when I was 13.  I baked on wood stoves, cleaned pieces of the collection and interacted with the public all while wearing dress, petticoat and bonnet.  (Yes, I was very cute!)

One day I was making oatmeal cookies with raisins in them and talking to visitors about Ontario in the 1870s.  A teen-aged boy pointed at the batter I was stirring and said that a fly had just flown into the bowl.  Rather than stick around to see my reaction, he followed his parents back out of the door and likely promptly forgot all about me.

I, on the other hand have never forgotten him.  No matter how many times I stirred and checked that dough, I never found the fly.  While I am certain now that he was just messing with me, my 13 year-old self was thoroughly grossed out at the prospect of eating fly.  I eventually baked the cookies (not wanting to waste the ingredients or to explain to my boss why I hadn’t made them) and cut them into halves to share with the visiting public.

The story for most people would have ended there, apart from a laugh with their friends about serving fly cookies to people.  Not me.  Instead, 23 years later, I have yet to enjoy a thing with raisins in it ever again.  Raisins bear a shockingly close resemblance and texture to what I imagine a fly might taste and feel like.  One passing comment from a stranger coupled with the stress it caused changed something deep inside of me that I have never gotten back.

But where else are there flies in my operating system?  Where else have small, seemingly innocent exchanges altered me so profoundly?  If you are canoeing across a lake, the slightest nudge in either direction will change where you land on the other side.  Which nudges got me here?  How can I filter out new ones coming in?  And how can I release the ones that don’t make any sense to hold onto at all? I really wish I knew.

xo