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Brave, inspiring women, Sacred Feminine, spirituality, The Seeker

Going Nova

July 12, 2010

“…I allow myself to be uncorked, unabashed, and showered with delicious good in every facet of my life.  I don’t need to fit in anymore, in the world of struggling, suffering, complaining, and belittling. I am going nova and that’s okay.” – Tama J. Kieves on CrazySexyLife.com

 

I did it again. I was going to write another post about woo woo, and in waiting for just the right moment to write it, I didn’t write it at all.  There is another post about it coming, but it’s not ready yet, so I wanted to check in.

Things in my head are quite strange, so I apologize if this is all over the place.  I just finished watching the movie Amelia.  It was gentle and lovely, and even though I knew how it ended, I willed her to make it just the same.  Sometimes I wonder if people were put on this earth just to show the rest of us how it is done.  We remember her for how her story ended, but the important part is that she lived.

A friend did a Reiki healing on me earlier this year.  When she got to my head she remarked that my energy felt like she was being given a deep fresh breath.  I’ve been thinking a lot about that in the months since.  I feel like there is a force, an energy within me that I haven’t quite accessed yet.  Lately I have realized that it is not from lack of trying but perhaps it is because I have been trying too hard.   What is important is not how my story ends, but the way that I have lived.  This isn’t new, or rocket science, but it is surprisingly hard to hold on to.

Just a few minutes ago I read the quote above and thought about the concept of going nova.  Nova: “a star that ejects some of its material in the form of a cloud and becomes more luminous in the process.”

Yes.  All I can say is yes.

Sacred Feminine, spirituality, The Seeker

How woo woo is too woo woo?

June 27, 2010

Human spirituality is to seek an answer to the question: ‘how can you make sense out of a world which does not seem to be intrinsically reasonable?’ – John D. Morgan

daisy and trees

Spirituality and creativity and nature have always been wrapped up in a tight package for me.  My first church was in the trees at a summer camp, my first memories of a proper built church are full of sitting on my Grandpa’s knee drawing.  Praying and playing and being surrounded by love were one and the same.  As I grew up and found out that that was not other people’s experience, I started to hide mine.  I never really showed myself again.

So although I know that woo woo means different things to different people, I see it as showing overt non traditional beliefs.  When I get to some blogs and I see how free they are with sharing their beliefs, I am either exhilarated or nervous and that rattles me.  So how much do I share on mine? I don’t want to scare you away.  Do I tell you that I have been googling shamanic healing or that I own Faerie Cards or that I have had reiki or that when I am home I like going to church with my Mom?  Do I talk about whether or not I pray or what I believe or that my favorite thing in the world is to find the spirituality section of a big bookstore?

At times I find myself censoring what I write because I am not sure that I am ready to share, but often the bloggers that talk about this part of their lives are the ones to whom I am most drawn.  I know that everyone is different, but what are the lines that you won’t cross?  What makes you stay and read more and what makes you click away immediately?  Is there room for questions of spirituality in a blog or does it put you off?

How woo woo is too woo woo?

Brave, fear, inspiring women, love, Sacred Feminine

Big Fat Failure

June 14, 2010

“Acting on your own behalf is about slowly becoming a person you can count on. It is about recognizing what you do that causes you pain and acting on those insights.” – Geneen Roth

 

growing treeGo gently.

There is a tender soul there.

They are doing the best they can, but they can’t see that.

They can’t see the path that is spiraling around ahead of them, bringing them closer and closer to where they want to be.

They only see that they aren’t getting there.

They only see the times that they didn’t follow through with their plan or didn’t listen to their inner voice. They only remember eating the world and sleeping through and letting fear be the boss.  They only remember that they somehow let themselves down.

They only see that they are a big fat failure.

They don’t see the tender human being who is doing the best they can.  They don’t see that everyone else is struggling too.  They don’t see that other people sleep in and eat the world and don’t write 10,000 words a day or have perfectly clean houses or perfect marriages or easy lives.

They don’t see that they are beautiful and getting there.

Go gently.

There is a tender soul there who is learning their lessons slowly.

They don’t see that every step forward that they do take is worth 5 steps back.

They don’t see the other people who are looking at them and wondering how they got to be so wonderful.

They don’t see that they shine.

Go gently.