“Believe me, the secret for harvesting from existence the greatest fruitfulness and greatest enjoyment is – to live dangerously.” – Nietzsche
I’m scared of the dark. I’m scared of the dark, mushrooms, violent images, cooking, failing, putting pictures of myself on my blog, and so much more. But another thing I have been scared of is quotes like the one at the top of this post: quotes that make you think that in order to live a “wild and precious life” (Mary Oliver) you have to throw caution to the wind, bite the bullet, and streak naked through your life. Talk about scary!
But this morning a light went on. In the spirit of my red year, I have picked up Sera Beak’s The Red Book again. Nervously reading it (it feels like a streaking naked book!) this morning, I suddenly got it. At the end of the introduction Sera writes:
“Ask yourself: How intensely do I want to exist?”
Click.
Yes.
Crap.
It’s not about causing trouble or being naughty or being dangerous. It’s not about shaking other people up, or pushing societies’ rules, or reciting poetry in your pajamas standing on your head on a busy street corner while blowing bubbles out of your ass. It’s about how intensely you are willing to experience your life. It is about the choices you make in every moment of every day of your very own life. It’s about being conscious.
I am ashamed to say that I have been consistently choosing the least conscious, and therefore easier option lately. But is it easier? In the long run is it easier to choose easy and then live with regret and self condemnation or would it actually be easier to make the more difficult choice and live with self esteem and pride?
How intensely do I want to exist? How can I live dangerously on my own terms? What am I going to do with my own wild and precious life? I’m not sure. I am going to sit with those questions for awhile and see where they take me now that I am not afraid of them anymore. At this point even baby steps feel gloriously dangerous.
“Ask yourself: How intensely do I want to exist?”
~what a wonderful post…really had my mind thinking…your questions are questions i think so many ask ourselves…i think in ways it is easier to live with regret because so many are afraid of the unknown…the what if…what could happen…i have been trying to embrace the other and push myself to be more of who and what i want out of my life…thank you for sharing this book…will be looking for it…may you push beyond those limits that keep from living your life in an intense authentic way…let your dreams guide you…one step at a time…”gloriously dangerous” you make it sound like much fun…liberating…brightest blessings~
How absolutely scrumptious! Getting wild on your on terms. Finding your own edge. Filling life up with your gorgeous colours. Living intensely. Yum!
Oh – now there is a question that stopped me in my tracks. It’s a combo of intensity and intention, I think (or maybe the intensity comes as a direct result of true intention).
Either way, you sparked something in my heart.
thank you
J.
I read this earlier this morning and it is playing over and over in my thoughts. For me this is a great question. I want to do so much, but need peace and stillness, finding balance is chanllenging, but when I ponder this question it seems to fuel me with the energy to live fully. Thank you
how intensely you are willing to experience your life. <– i love that line!!!
That book is absolutely amazing. Seriously. (As you know, lol). The thing I got the most out of Sera’s writing is that spirituality is all about living fully, experiencing everything, and as you say, living intensly. And remember, the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single steps! So keep those baby steps up!
this might just be the question that has been keeping me awake at night, or more the answer to the question probably.
thank you
So many nuggets in this post – I definitely want to buy The Red Book. And, you’re right, I’ve learned from experience that, in the long term, it is not actually “easy” to take the safe, “acceptable” path but, until I’m more sure than I am now, that is where I will remain.
agree that there are so many nuggets in this post – I want to buy YOUR book ms mighty megg 🙂
xxx
well, thank GOD it’s not about blowing bubbles out of our asses.
you amaze me. telling it like it is and making me think bigger, better, and more honestly about myself. and i am so grateful that to have you as an ally in these questions.
bravo, friend.
Are you sure it’s not about shaking other people up? Cause if you keep talking like this you gonna shake up some ass girl!
xx
Ouch. Some hard truth in this post. In other words… thank you.
May I walk with you? I have groaning bookshelves as well. For me its some sort of idea of doing things by proxy (duh, it doesn’t work, you have to do by doing, no way around it). Reading about it is not doing it. So …gots to do it, whatever that may be.
Congrats!
Once you discover your job is not to change the world, but to change YOURSELF, you’re on your way.
A Truth (yes, capital T Truth) most who think they’re wise and enlightened haven’t learned, and so they really aren’t.
I’ve rather randomly stumbled upon your post. I liked your writing and thanks for sharing the question: “Ask yourself: How intensely do I want to exist?”
I like how it’s not ‘to live’ but ‘to exist’. We eventually die. When taken literally, we die by ceasing to exist. But in a way, you or perhaps some fragments of you can exist in memories of other people. Or perhaps those fragments of you exist as a form of ideas. Like, Ghandhi is dead, but his ideas aren’t. Those ideas will keep existing as long as they are great ones. Existing even when you are dead. That’s very intense.
Probably I’m a bit off the track from the question, but that’s what I thought when I thought of what the question meant.
I just finished The Red Book. I loved it. Sometimes, living dangerously is as simple as putting on red lipstick… for me, at least. That’s really taking a walk on the wild side.
I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching lately and this came at exactly the right moment. It is scary–especially when you ask questions of yourself and the answers don’t immediately come to you…it takes time, concentration and meditation, but to make LIVING, really experiencing life a priority, I believe the answers will come.
Wow….that question…is it easier to choose easy and then live with regret and self condemnation or would it actually be easier to make the more difficult choice and live with self esteem and pride?
That is a question I have never considered before. What an eye opener! That is a question that me and my fears need to sit down and have a really good chat about.
Thank you. You always leave me thinking….about the good stuff, the real stuff, the blood and guts stuff that can bring about actual change.
By the way, what an adorable pic of you!
🙂
Some thoughts arising from this wonderful post:
It is good to have a feeling of where we want to go and there is always more danger in staying within our comfort zone than in daring to push toward a goal.
The journey must be valued, even when the going is slow.
Sometimes the baby steps are all we can manage.
Find the next mile-post and celebrate when it is achieved. Then move on to the next.
Thank you, and keep on writing!